Life Gets in the Way

It happens to everyone. You have goals, you have plans, and something always gets in the way and sometimes things have to be put on hold. It is frustrating and maddening but it’s life.

For me it was bills. I had to put finances first before I could continue with my fertility treatments. What sucked most was that I already had begun my next round of Femara at the end of December when I started my period and when I called to schedule my ultrasounds, I was told that I couldn’t because I still owed a co-payment… Okay, that was my fault; I should have paid. I was still pissed off because they could have told me before I started my medicine and ordered my Ovidrel shot. Being right before Christmas, I just didn’t have the money.

Come January I had no choice but to see if the Femara would work on its own without the shot. My period came just on time, so no pregnancy. I then had to wait until tax returns came in to pay my doctor and so February came and went without medicine at all and we all know how that turned out…

So here I am, the end of March. I’ve paid what I owed and since I couldn’t take medicine last month, my period was a no show. My doctor started me back on Femara and on my fifth day of 7.5 mg, my period started and so I was put on another five days. I had my ultrasounds as scheduled and I only had one good follicle at size 22 mm, but all it takes is one! So, I took my Ovidrel and I’m nearing the end of my two week wait.

This time around I’m doing pretty well. It wasn’t until yesterday that I thought much about whether or not this round would work. Usually I obsess over it. I had no choice, I ended up with a yeast infection and I had to call my doctor to see if the medicine I got at the store was safe to take in case I was pregnant…then it hit me that I only had a few days left before my two week wait was over!

With the thought it my mind, I remembered stories I’ve read about other women that never had yeast infections until they were pregnant and it was their first sign of pregnancy. I tried to push the thought from my mind, after all I’ve had yeast infections before, just not often.

My breasts are very full but they don’t hurt like they usually do before my period, they are just heavy and my husband even noticed before I did. The only other “symptom” (if you can call it that) is utter EXHAUSTION! The last four or five days I have been so tired and when I’m awake I feel groggy.

I don’t normally feel this way before my period and sometimes I will come home and take a nap after bringing my husband to work so early in the morning but these last few days I’ve HAD to take a nap. My body gave me no choice. For instance: Yesterday I was fine when I brought hubby to work. I went home, got a paper I needed for the DMV, went to the store to go grocery shopping, stopped at the DMV, got home and put everything away and I was still full of energy. I didn’t even want to sit down! I can’t remember the last time I was so energized. I decided to play one of my video games (yes, I play) and I ate something for lunch and suddenly my body felt so heavy and I could hardly lift the remote to play and my eyes just wouldn’t stay open. It was like a sugar crash without the sugar!

Today I went back to bed when I got home and I woke up on my own at eleven this morning but I’m still tired and groggy, though I doubt I’d be able to sleep even if I tried…

I’m trying not to read too much into anything. I’ve taken a test today and it was negative, as I expected. So I’m just going to wait…